revealing HIS role

Tonight as I tried to make sense of some of the pain in my heart, I prayed for ability to understand a concept I was recently advised of. "God is your Perfect Husband." I didn't quite get it...I mean I didn't quite understand how that was supposed to feel true. How could God be a husband to me? Isn't God "above" being a husband? Shouldn't a husband be like God? I told God I was sorry I didn't understand and asked to know what He meant by this statement.

As I calmed down, I reached for a book of verses for women. When I began to open the book looking for another passage I read recently that I found comforting and wise, my thumb "tripped" and I turned to a page with the following verse...no lie! Here is what I read and immediately praised Him for revealing His explanation to me.

"'The God who made you is like your husband. His name is the Lord All-Powerful. The Holy One of Israel is the one who saves you. He is called the God of all the earth. You were like a woman whose husband left her, and you were very sad. You were like a wife who married young and then her husband left her. But the Lord called you to be his,' says your God." - Isaiah 54:5-6

The book went on to explain that "when you feel a longing to be needed and wanted, remember, God called you to be his...God is willing to fill any and all empty niches in your life." Even if a woman has a good husband, it is impossible for him to fill all her needs. "It is also true that some husbands are absent" and in these circumstances, God can step in and be the strength, provider, protection, and friend. I can turn to God for the things I need in my husband, when he refuses or is unable to offer them. "God promises to always be with you and to be actively involved in your life."

Thanks to God for directing me to further understanding of yet another role he can fulfill in my life.

10 Things I Love About My Spouse

A friend gave me a list of prompts for journaling or scrapbooking. One of them caught my attention and I thought it would be appropriate to share here, since this blog is about counting my blessings.

10 Things I Love About My Husband...seems like something that most wives would want to brag about often, but in my brief marital experience, the things I love about my husband aren't always the things I talk about instantly. As wives we are advised to not speak poorly of our husbands to others, but so often it seems easier to share the frustrating parts of marriage, rather than the blessings.

So in effort to earn forgiveness for my slight of mouth, I want to share, wholeheartedly (and humbly) the...

10 Things I Love About My Husband:

1. His work ethic ~ I will never have to worry about him not providing for our family. He works to provide for us every day of the week, and rarely complains.
2. His devotion to family, even when he won't admit it.
3. His bright blue eyes and how deeply they look at me.
4. He often is first to say he loves me after we argue.
5. His willingness to help loved ones and friends. He's also a thoughtful and generous tipper.
6. The silly side he only shows me; he makes me laugh!
7. He remembers things I say I'd like and then surprises me with them as gifts for Christmas or my birthday.
8. He dreams big and plans how to achieve his goals.
9. He likes most of my cooking and doesn't complain about meals.
10. He gets mad at me when I get the door for myself.

Actually as I listed I realized I could keep listing more qualities or thoughts about my husband. Instead, I'll save those for another day when I need to remind myself of the blessings God has given me in my husband and through marriage.

Change the tendency to vent about challenges in your marriage and share the blessings instead.
What are 5-10 things you love about your spouse?

Woman to woman...shhhhhhh

Recently I read an article that suggested 10 things to say to "wow" your "guy." I was intrigued, because my husband tries to keep a straight face whenever I compliment him, so I never know if he is flattered or annoyed. So I tried a few of them, and I immediately saw results. Here are the ones I used:

"Your arms are definitely looking bigger."

I said this to him and he got all bashful, and shy, looking modest and said "I don't think so...really?" So cute! Having been married now for several years, I'm finally accepting that men don't want the same compliments women crave. "You look nice," or "I like your hair" doesn't go over the same on most men. However, I do believe that men still care what we think of their bodies and even if they don't admit it, a little affirmation that their bods still spark us up, goes a long way.

"Ha ha ha ha ha ha ha."

I love laughing, especially when it means encouraging his laugh. The more I talk to fellow wives, the more I realize how silly husbands can be behind closed doors with their wives. Giving a hearty laugh really encouraged the fun behavior and sparked an energy that went beyond a good laugh. ;)

"Wow." or "Impressive!"

It sounded cheesy and stereotypical, but it worked. I don't remember what I chose to respond to with this, but I do remember that he paused in his tracks and looked affirmed. It doesn't matter what you use it for; could be a tremendous feat or an everyday chore, but saying this little word seemed to show my appreciation for his efforts as a man, more than "thank you" or "you did a good job" could ever communicate.

"The kids just adore you."

We don't have kids yet, but I know how important being a good dad will be to my husband when we do have a child. I'll have to remember this affirmation...let me know if it works. :)

"What do you think?"

I often find myself caught up in what "I think" when it comes to decisions in our marriage, and this simple question of interest not only allows him input, but also forces me to slow down and listen.

"Cute feet."

Hard to explain, but it did cause a giggle, smile, and bashful reaction. Often men's feet are not considered appealing, and complimenting this feature proved worth the effort. I think the only time a woman could get away with using "cute" to describe a part of the male body is in this case...use sparingly or they may get suspicious.

"I want you."

Simple, to the point, and obviously meeting one of man's primary interests, and affirming you still find him appealing. Just be sure you have time for the response...

Please feel free to share your own experiences with "wow-ing" your man. In my experience I am happier when he is happy, and he is happy when I am happy; to encourage the circle I'm willing to spare a few one-liners to make his moment. Happy wow-ing!