Wasted

I've found it hard to share here lately, mostly because I feel as though there is an expected expiration date on my current struggles. If I continue to wade through the same garbage does that mean I'm getting somewhere or does it mean I'm defeated? I can't decide yet because I'm still waiting for one whole day of pure and fresh air, one day when I don't lose my footing and slide back down into the dumpster, not even one toe slip. The breaths are getting longer, but the stench is still very present.

I drove home, another solitary Friday evening, and wondered when I will stop believing that just because I was thrown into the trash that I am actually trash. Maybe it's just the time of year, a time when traditions used to run deep and now they are just memories left in the dust, most never to be spoken of again. Perhaps it's another year gone by, still with little obvious progress or change to my circumstances. Maybe it's just me. But I'm hoping to understand the secret to actually believing that a diamond is always valuable, even if it's thrown away and never retrieved or thought of again.

Or is that diamond's value wasted when it's given to someone who doesn't know it's a diamond?