As this year begins to wrap up I feel God pulling me slowly from the mud in which I was shoved at the beginning of the year. He has provided for me, He has been healing me, He has allowed me to laugh and learn and grow, even through so many tears. I am at peace about most of the choices and reactions I made this year, even though I'm sure many of my family, friends, and even foes, don't always understand how or why those choices were right for me. I continue to be directed back to a verse which sums up exactly what I've learned this year, which was exactly how and why I was able to react and respond and behave as I have this year -- even at times that those choices were the opposite of what I really felt like.
"Am I now trying to win the approval of men, or God? Or am I still trying to please men? If I were still trying to please men, I would not be a servant of Christ.”
Galatians 1:10
This verse wasn't revealed to me until recently and I believe now that was because at any other time this year I wouldn't have really believed this advice was true. There were other scripture, other passages, other pieces of support and advice and truth that helped me to make choices that would ultimately reflect back to me that in the end God's approval is all that matters. Now I see that this was a huge lesson for me this year, which was the only lesson to help me through the storm. I admit it's still so easy to want the approval of people, especially one man, but that approval is harder to receive and is not as loyal and trustworthy as that of God.
I will continue to do the best I can to make choices and responses based on His approval, and not his. Only in seeking His approval have I found lasting peace with my actions and the hope and faith for the future I've been promised.
In the end, each of us will stand before Him, void of any approval we received from man. I refuse to stand in doubt of His approval at that time. I want to stand in assurance.
Monday, October 13, 2008
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